Monday, December 18, 2006

Desperate Times.....


Yeah, thats me, nothing held back (well, mostly nothing held back, and I hear your grateful whispers). I nearly threw up when I saw this picture. I've blogged pretty openly about my struggle with weight, about trying to find the balance of motivation, disgust, good habits, and the spiritual, emotional, and physical issues that complicate. I continue to take some steps forward, then gloriously wipe out. You know what they say about desperate times, about what they require? This picture posted on a blog that my church family reads and looks at, this is my desperate measure. What is that thing that finally takes you across chasm of defeat into victory? People do cross it! I haven't found it, yet, but for all that is a warrior in me I will not hide, at all, anymore.

I try to tell myself I really don't look like this picture, but, no, there it is, truth. So, do you see the starting date? That's me in front of my frig (freakin' poetic), on December 18th, 2006. Yes its the holidays, yes, we just bought some holiday chocolate, and I just finished Bueno, but really, if I wait until after the holidays, what will I find to put it off next? Something, I'll find something. So maybe instead of an American "Christmas" season of overgifting and overeating I'll have a genuine "Advent" season when the coming of Christ will mark when I am set free. Time will tell.

Here's how it will work. I will post a picture, regardless of results, as close to every six weeks as I can. Success, failure, whatever, the picture, along with this "before" shot, will be posted. The battery in my scale is dead, so I will add my weight as soon as I get a battery, and update that as well. Many of you have come this far reading and encouraging, now, ride with me again.

"What can men do against such reckless hate?" "Ride out to meet them.."

Of course, this post and picture may be like a wild night with my friend Captain Morgan: sounds great at the time, deep regret in the morning. Ah well, bottoms up!